


Walking With Your Memory

by calikocat



Series: Walking With... [2]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-03
Updated: 2016-08-03
Packaged: 2018-07-29 01:28:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7664998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calikocat/pseuds/calikocat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Rick was alive, Rick was holding the both of them, and it was the happiest day of Shane's life, standing there with his forehead pressed to Rick's Carl in their arms.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Walking With Your Memory

**Author's Note:**

> Note 1: Still looking for an escape, this show has hit me with way too many feels.
> 
> Note 2: Companion piece to Walking with Life in Mind, goes over what Shane and Carl went through to get to the Quarry camp and a more detailed version of their reunion with Rick.
> 
> Note 3: That said, obviously the pairing is Rick/Shane.
> 
> Note 4: I like Lori in general...but Rick & Shane would have been a lot happier without her in the picture. So Lori and Rick are divorced and have been for at least a year. The guys are Partners with a capitol P.

Walking With Your Memory  
calikocat

Word count: 8780

Disclaimer: The Walking Dead does not belong to me.

XXX

_“You never told me how things went when you dropped Carl off this morning.”_

_Rick huffed and threw the napkin down by their shared lunch. “I thought after the divorce we wouldn't be going through this crap. I thought the fighting would stop once she had her space and her life back.”_

_Shane looked at him. “You weren't there for more than ten minutes, I clocked you. There's no way you could have been there longer than that, not between our place, her place, and the station.”_

_“Yeah. Next time I'll just take Carl to school myself and drop off his stuff in the afternoon.”_

_“That bad huh?”_

_“Hell Shane, she said she wondered if I had ever cared about her at all...and questioned how I feel about Carl, right in front of him.”_

_Shane reached for his hand and gave it a squeeze, they didn't show much affection on the job, Sheriff's orders, but he wouldn't leave his lover and best friend without the comfort he needed. “Rick, you know Carl knows you love him. You've done everything possible to let him know that, before the divorce, through it and even now.”_

_Rick squeezed back before they released one another. “I know. I know he knows that, and he knows you care about him too, and that kid loves having two dads around. I just wish she wouldn't say that kinda crap in front of him, especially first thing in the morning before she takes him to school.”_

_“I'm sorry Babe.”_

_“Not your fault, Lori just can't seem to stop bein' pissed at me. When we were together I tried so hard. She'd always go on about wantin' to talk and express our feelings, but then when I did she'd just get mad. Like she didn't want to hear what I had to say at all, it didn't make any sense. Maybe we just married too young and as we grew up we became people that weren't compatible.”_

_“Maybe, you did marry right out of high school.”_

_Rick nodded. “Yeah, and I'd accept that as the reason, if it weren't for you and me.”_

_Shane frowned. “What?”_

_“Shane we've been friends since we were kids; all through elementary, junior high and high school. Even college. You were the best man at our wedding...you got me through the divorce...and now.” He held up his left hand and the silver band, which matched the one Shane wore, gleamed in the afternoon light. “We've known each other all our lives and we get along better than Lori and I ever did.”_

_“Doesn't compare man, and we have both changed since we were kids...and as much tail as I chased in high school and college I wasn't ready for the kind of life and commitment we have now. If we'd tried this in high school or college we wouldn't have made it, and we probably would have ruined our friendship.”_

_Rick smiled at him. “You sayin' we both needed to grow up for this to work the way it has?”_

_“Somethin' like that.”_

_“Then I'm glad it’s worked out that way.”_

_Shane grinned. “We get off shift today I'll cook you dinner, and then we aren't leavin' the bed 'till mornin'.”_

_Rick laughed; the sound lighter than it had been all day. “That sounds good.”_

_“All available units, high speed pursuit in progress; Linden County units request local assistance. Highway 18 South, GTAAD W21743. Proceed with extreme caution.”_

_“We're up.” Rick said and they packed up their food and Shane tossed it in the trashcan they were parked by just as Rick started the car, lights and sirens full blast._

_“Suspects are two male Caucasians. Be advised, they have fired on police officers. One Linden County officer is wounded.”_

~x~

Shane sat in the visitor's chair by Rick's bed; Carl curled up next to his father, half asleep, while Shane read to them. Carl had claimed that he was too old to be read too, but reasoned that Rick might like to hear Shane's voice while he was resting. Shane hadn't been able to say no, he never could, not when it came to this.

They'd been coming here every weekend since the shooting, since he'd seen Rick take two bullets, one in the vest and the other in his flesh. It had been weeks and he could still see Rick's pale face; shocked with pain beneath him while Shane tried to stop the bleeding. All the while he begged Rick to stay with him, to not leave him behind, to not leave Carl behind.

“Shane?”

He startled at Carl's voice and cleared his throat. “Yeah bud?”

“Why'd you stop reading?”

Shane tried to smile. “Thoughts caught up with me man, where did I stop?”

“I can read for a while.” Carl offered. “If-if you wanted to keep Dad company.”

He tried not to let the heartache on his face show, but it must not have worked because Carl slid off the bed, careful of all the wires and tubes and took the book from Shane's hands. Shane knew when he was beat and ruffled Carl's hair before kicking off his boots and crawling onto the hospital bed beside his lover.

Rick remained unresponsive just as the doctors said he would. It was the quickest way for him to heal and Shane realized that, but seeing the man he loved, the man who had been such a big part of his life since they were younger than Carl, so still... He could barely stand it, at least when he was lying beside him he could see and hear him breathing. It was better than nothing, and Carl must have realized he needed this, because before Shane even realized it he was fast asleep.

 

It was dark in the room when he woke and for a second he wasn't sure where he was. The bed didn't feel like theirs, but he was definitely curled into Rick's side, and it all came rushing back. The shooting, the blood, the hospital and Carl reading to them. Shit! Shane sat up carefully and tried to look into the shadows for his charge. Lori would kill him if he lost track of Carl, Rick wouldn't be happy either when he woke up.

Carl, however, didn't seem to have a worry in the world; fast asleep on a cot on the other side of the room. Damn, he'd meant to get Carl back to their place and make sure he got a decent meal in him and some decent sleep in a familiar bed. He reached for the light above the bed and turned it on, hoping it didn't disturb the boy, it didn't and he stood, stretching.

The door to the room opened and it made him jump a bit when the floor nurse peeked in. “Mr. Walsh?”

He rubbed at his face, hand going through his hair next. “Yes?”

“We've been keeping some food warm for you if you're hungry?”

Shane blinked and nodded, his stomach growling right on cue. “Did Carl eat?”

She smiled at him kindly. “We were checking the rooms when visiting hours were over; your stepson asked if the two of you could stay. He said you hadn't been sleeping well without your husband.”

He felt his heart swell a bit, as well as his guilt; here Carl was taking care of him when he was supposed to be taking care of Carl. “Boy's not wrong. Think I just had the best few hours of sleep since the shooting.”

“We've kept an eye on him all night and made sure he ate.”

Shane gave her a grateful smile and tried not to let the tears fall. “Thank you.”

She nodded at him. “I'll get that plate of food for you.” She left him and Shane sat back down in the chair he'd vacated hours ago. Rick lay there unchanged, the bed to one side of him rumpled, first from Carl, then from him.

“I never thought we'd go through something like this.” He spoke to the empty air wondering if Rick could hear him like Carl seemed to hope. “You're always so careful when we're out there, so patient.” Shane felt the first tear slip down. “Man I thought I was scared when that first bullet hit, I thought I was scared when your blood was all over my hands...but Rick...you stuck in that bed with me all alone has me more scared than I could ever imagine.”

“You're not alone.” Carl's voice made him jump and he looked over to boy sitting up on his cot.

“No, no I'm not. It just feels like it sometimes. Sorry I messed up our weekend Carl.”

Carl shook his head. “You didn't mess it up, we're spending it with Dad, and he'd want me to take care of you.”

“Thanks bud.”

xxx

The next morning the nurses on Rick's floor gently kicked them out after feeding them and making sure Shane had a cup of coffee in his hand. No one wanted the doctor to know they'd stayed the night, and pretty much the entire weekend, in Rick's room. Shane got that, he knew all about rules and protocol, he also knew that sometimes you needed to bend them if you wanted to be able to meet your eyes in the mirror and still call yourself human.

Still it got them going and they managed to get back to the house, shower and get ready for school and work. The place had felt so empty since Rick's injury and neither had minded staying at the hospital. Another cup of coffee in his hand and Shane had them in his jeep, Carl to go to his Mom's and him to the station after.

Lori was waiting for them on the porch, hands on her hips and anger in her eyes. It made Shane flashback to the bit of wisdom Rick had shared with him and it made him wish he'd just taken Carl onto school and dropped his things off that afternoon. He wasn't ready for this confrontation.

Carl shot him a look, mumbled the words, “Sorry Shane,” and dashed inside so he wouldn't have to witness what was bound to be a huge fight. Shane didn't mind, Rick wouldn't have wanted him to see this either. He got out, grabbed Carl's bag from the back and made his way to the porch.

“Mornin'.”

“I called the house yesterday to check on Carl, when you didn't pick up I decided not to worry, I figured you two had gone to the hospital. But I called again last night and you still didn't pick up. Your cell phone was off too...so I went to your house Shane. Where the hell were you with my son all weekend?”

“You were right. We were at the hospital.”

“All night?”

He shrugged. “I fell asleep.”

“You fell asleep?” Her words were disbelieving and her hands were clenched like she wanted to hit him. “That's your excuse?”

“Carl was curled up with him while I read to them, we always do that...yesterday Carl offered to read so I could lie beside Rick. I fell asleep beside my lover, my husband, and it was the best damn sleep I've gotten in weeks.” The silence between them was stunned and heavy and he met her eyes without flinching. “Pull whatever crap you want with Rick, your issues are with him, not me. I'm not saying I'm not embarrassed that Carl had to take care of me this weekend as much as I took care of him. I should have let you know where we were gonna be, and that's the only thing I'm apologizing for.” He handed her Carl's bag and he left her standing there still stunned.

xxx

_Shane was on his hands and knees, head bent low as he braced himself to take Rick's thrusts, a hand snaking around his waist to take his cock and squeeze one of the best orgasms he'd ever had in his life right out of him. They collapsed like that, Rick curled up behind him, around him, Hell, still inside him and Shane thought Lori was the stupidest woman in the world to give this man up._

_“I love you.” The words were mumbled into his neck and Shane tried to pull away so he could kiss that mouth, only when he turned his hands slid under the pillow to find a small box._

_“Rick?”_

_Rick pulled out of him and their eyes met; an embarrassed smile on Rick's face. “I was goin' to give you that in the mornin'.” Shane's heart skipped a beat and he pulled the little black box from under the pillow. Inside were two plain silver bands, men's wedding rings. “It won't be official since the state of Georgia's a little behind the times...but I wanna marry you Shane.”_

_“Holy shit.”_

_“Not quite the reaction I was hopin' for.”_

_Then Shane was on him, straddling him and kissing him for all he was worth, not even bothering to wipe away the tears on his face. He backed off long enough to say “Yes” and let Rick slip a ring on his finger and let him do the same for Rick. Then Rick was hard beneath him again and Shane slipped him back inside, going slower this time around, hands clasped together the silver bands almost glowing in the lamplight._

~x~

Shane shook the memory away, though he kept staring at the silver ring on his finger. He missed Rick something fierce, and the world was getting crazier every day, reports of some sort of super flu that messed with people’s minds and drove them to cannibalism. Freaking Leon Basset had almost been bit on patrol today; the guy just kept coming after them no matter how many times he was warned, or shot, and didn't stop until Shane put a bullet in his head. It was the scariest damn thing Shane had ever seen, and now he was on forced leave because he'd been involved in another shooting so soon after what had happened to Rick.

Worst of all Leon would not shut up about it.

“Can you believe that shit?” Leon said again, for what had to be the tenth time. “That asshole almost bit me! What if he had rabies or somethin'?”

“Well then Leon I guess you're pretty lucky, but if you're so worried about it I suggest you go to the hospital and get checked out.” He slammed his locker door shut, bag over his shoulder, and he strode out of the locker room. Linda and Diane wanted him to take the vase of flowers they'd all chipped in on down to the hospital. If he hurried he'd be able to go there first before picking Carl up from school. They had plans that actually involved going out for the weekend, to the arcade and movies because Lori didn't want Carl cooped up in a hospital every weekend.

He picked up the flowers, delivered them to Rick's bedside but didn't linger. If he sat by the man's side he'd be tempted to stay and he had responsibilities. He did take a moment though to brush Rick's hair back from his forehead, and place a chaste kiss on his dry lips.

“Love you Rick.”

 

He picked up Carl from school as promised and they went straight to the mall and the arcade where Carl won most of the games they played; except for the shooting games, Shane won all of those. Then they picked up a pizza on the way home and stayed up late watching movies Lori would never approve of. Carl fell asleep halfway through the third movie and Shane gently picked him up and put him to bed, leaving him in his clothes, but taking off his shoes. From experience he knew to leave the nightlight in the hall on and went about cleaning up the leftover pizza and putting away the DVDs.

Finally he was able to crash in his lonely bed for the night.

xxx

The military came over the weekend, and the threat of that super flu got very real. It didn't make people go crazy and turn them into cannibals, it killed them...and they came back as corpses that couldn't get enough of the living. Once you got bit, that was it, you were as good as dead and when you died you ate the people around you.

It wasn't just happening in King County, it was happening everywhere, and small towns like theirs were being evacuated to the cities. Atlanta was supposed to have a large refugee center and Shane knew, he knew, it would be up to him to get Lori and Carl there.

He wanted to wait though, the hospital was supposed to transport their patients to Atlanta. Shane didn't want to leave for the city until Rick was on his way there as well.

But then things got worse...

 

He'd just been cleared to go back on duty after the officer involved shooting and had literally just gotten into work when the Sheriff called an emergency meeting. They were off duty until further notice, everyone was being forced to evacuate...the dead were multiplying and the small forces in town weren't able to keep up. There was no safety to be had in King County.

Shane was back in his jeep as soon as the Sheriff dismissed them and he called Lori from his cell phone. The lines, however, were jammed with everyone was panicking and trying to contact loved ones, and so he couldn't get through to her.

He did the only thing he could do, he prayed, and he made his way to the hospital to find it in pure chaos. The soldiers were shooting people, not just the dead and the bitten, but anyone who they suspected might be infected. He couldn't believe he was seeing the horrors in front of him, a line of civilians just gunned down like they were trash.

And Rick...Rick was still in his coma oblivious to everything.

Shane got a gurney and moved it to Rick's door, having every intention of putting his lover on it and getting him the hell out of there. He got back in the room and tried to lift Rick from the bed, forgetting for a moment that he was still hooked to all those machines. Shane had no idea if it was safe to unhook him from a single contraption, and when he'd tried to get help there'd been no one who would stop and give him even a minute.

He had to dive behind Rick's bed when a soldier cleared the room so he wouldn't end up shot; he'd be no good to anyone dead. When the door closed again Shane just gazed at the machines and Rick in panic and hopelessness.

“Baby if you're gonna wake up, it better be now, because I don't know what to do.”

There was a boom, an explosion of some sort that rocked the building, and a little bit of dust fell on them from the ceiling. The machines clicked off and Shane stared, worried, his heart racing in his ears, mimicking the gunshots in the hallway.

He rose to listen for Rick's heart, to feel it in his chest, and there was nothing. No breath from his nose or lips. Shane let out a sob he couldn't hold back. “No, Rick, no!” No response at all, and he couldn't stay. He'd promised to take care of Carl.

One more kiss to Rick's lips, one more chance to cup his face, and Shane took the matching silver band his husband wore and slipped it on his finger beside his own. With nothing else to be done he left the room and Rick's body behind. He latched the door, and shoved the gurney in front of it...with it blocked that way; maybe nothing would defile his body.

And Shane ran out of the hospital.

xxx

Shane stopped by his house first and packed up his duffel; socks, extra shoes, jeans, cargo pants, shirts and a jacket. Then before he even realized what he was doing he had Rick's bag packed as well. He stared at the bag filled with Rick's clothes and willed his tears back before grabbing a spare bag and packing some of Carl's things that had been left there over a series of weekends.

Then, because he didn't know what to expect at the refugee center, he got a fourth bag; wondering just how many backpacks and duffel bags they had collected and loaded it with all the bottled water they had in the fridge and pantry. Another was filled with canned goods and all the bags went in the back of his jeep, even the one with Rick's clothes. For some reason he couldn't bear to leave it behind.

Last he got his old cooler and the water cooler, one he filled with cold packs and the last of the fresh fruit and lunch meat that he'd gotten at the store. Lori had been adamant that they get Carl to eat something besides junk food when he was with them. The water cooler he dumped all the ice into and filled it with water from the tub faucet. Then everything went into the back of the jeep. The only thing left to do was grab his rifle, his sidearm, and all the ammo he had at the house.

Then he was off to Lori's to pick up her and Carl.

 

His heart jumped in his throat when he pulled into Lori's driveway, the front door was standing open and the screen door barely hanging on its hinges. On the porch floor was a body. Shane got his Beretta and crept toward the porch, gun trained on the dead man. It was Lori's next door neighbor, Al Cranson, his head was bashed in but Shane could see the blood and flesh caught in his teeth. Shit...he'd bitten someone.

Shane made his way inside the house, opening the damaged screen door, and wincing when it creaked loudly. He stepped carefully, eyes cautious; the way he would clear any house when investigating a call. That was when he found her, crouched on the floor, eating a dog, he wasn't sure where the dog had come from, but the rest he could figure out. Al Cranson had been turned and bit Lori.

“Jesus.”

He really shouldn't have said anything, his voice caught her attention and what was left of Lori turned to face him, the dog's flesh falling out of her mouth as she caught sight of him. With a hungry snarl she stood and came at him. Shane shot her, one bullet to the head and she was down for good.

“Christ Lori, I am so sorry.” He left her laying there, finding Carl a priority, however, as he searched the entire house there was no sight of him. Then he saw the note on the stairs that led to the attic.

_Shane,_  
_If you're reading this then you've already had to take care of me, I'm sorry about that, but I simply couldn't do that with Carl in the house. He's safe, I told him to hide in the attic where nothing could get him. I don't know how long it will take you to get here, but he has some cereal bars and water and its air conditioned up there. I'm sorry for putting so much responsibility on you, especially with all that you've already done for him. For Rick. Thank you for everything, for being there for Rick when things fell apart between us. I'm glad he had you this past year. Please, take care of Carl for me, keep him safe and tell him I love him more than anything.  
_ _Lori_

Shane took a breath, holstered his gun, and went up the ladder. The hatch to the attic was locked from the inside, so he knocked gently. “Carl?”

There was a rustling and a click before the hatch opened and Carl's tear streaked face peered down at him. “Shane?”

“Hey bud.”

“Mom- Mom said to wait for you.”

“Got room up there for me?”

Carl nodded and backed up so Shane could climb up and join him in the attic, the refugee center could wait a few minutes, they both needed to ground themselves for the journey ahead. Not to mention Shane would need to move Lori's body before letting Carl go back downstairs. Kid didn't need to see his mother like that.

xxx

By the time Shane had let Carl out of the attic he'd gone down ahead and moved Lori's body to the trunk of her car, along with the dog she'd killed. The neighbor, Cranson, who had bitten Lori he drug off the porch and left around the side of the house. Then he'd packed another bag for Carl, and Carl himself had grabbed a few more meaningful toys and on a whim Shane grabbed a photo album. He wasn't sure why, it just felt like something he needed to do.

Then they'd headed down to Atlanta, stopping only to fill up the jeep's tank and the two gas cans Shane had grabbed from home and Lori's. It seemed, however, that everyone in every surrounding county had the same idea and were headed for Atlanta. It made sense considering the emergency broadcasts told everyone to go there, to the refugee center that had been set up.

Shane thought the people who had set up the center, FEMA or whoever, had misjudged the turnout they were going to get. He'd never seen so many cars headed in the same direction, in fact it seemed like they were almost bumper to bumper the entire way to Atlanta. At least they'd been going at a steady pace and not stopping until that afternoon when traffic came to a sudden standstill, and never picked back up.

They'd been stuck in traffic for hours now, the sun had set and it had been so long that everyone had turned off their engines; hardly anyone was even sitting in their cars. Shane was glad that he'd thought to grab a few things to keep Carl occupied on the trip to Atlanta, Hell, he was glad Carl had thought to do the same. At the moment though, Carl was in the back of the Cherokee behind his jeep playing checkers with a girl a couple of years older than him. Sophia Peletier.

Her mother, Carol, was keeping an eye on both kids while Shane kept his radio on to try and see if there was anything new on the air. For hours though there had only been the same recording about the refugee center, and that everyone should head there in an orderly fashion. Then...suddenly...the recording just stopped and Shane felt that same foreboding dread he'd felt when he'd gotten to Lori's house.

He turned the key, not wanting to waste the jeep's battery when there was no longer anything to listen too except the near constant stream of choppers overhead and got out of his jeep. Ed Peletier raised a brow at him and Shane shook his head. “The broadcasts stopped.”

“What do ya mean stopped?”

“I mean there's nothing, not even that stupid recording anymore.”

Ed frowned, and kept smoking his cigarette. “Well that ain't good.”

“No, it’s not.” He went around the side to check on Carl, who was still playing checkers with Sophia. “Hey bud, I'm gonna walk ahead and what I can find out.”

“I want to come with you.”

“No, man. I need you to stay here okay. Hey, you kids hungry?” Both nodded and Shane winked at Carl. “Carl why don't you and Sophia get out those apples and bananas? Got to eat them first right?”

“Yeah, come on Sophia.” Carl hopped down and Sophia followed him to the cooler in the jeep.

Shane looked at Carol. “You mind watching him for a bit, while I find out what's going on?”

“Not at all; and thank you.” She gestured to where the kids were laughing and raiding his cooler for snacks. “I didn't think to pack any fresh fruit.”

“Well it was in the fridge and would have gone to waste if I'd left it at home. Thanks Carol.” He started to walk away, ruffling Carl's hair as he walked past him and offered Sophia a smile. “Behave.”

“I will.” As he walked away he heard Sophia speak.

“I like your dad, he's nice.”

“Shane's my other dad, my step-dad...my dad's dead.” Carl's voice broke a bit and he saw Sophia take his hand out of the corner of his eye. That loss might not be something either of them would ever get over.

He walked up the road a ways, by passing group after group of people milling around, all wondering what the holdup was. Shane really hopped that the military or city officials or FEMA, whoever the hell was running the refugee center, hadn't decided to close its doors and turn people away. It they tried there would be a riot, and with this many people in line to get into the city there would be no controlling a crowd that big.

The sound of helicopters overhead made him pause and he looked up to see a group of military choppers fly toward the city. It sent a few people over the edge and a fight broke out right behind him. He ignored the scuffle and went off road, cutting through the woods to get a better look at the city; those choppers were different than the ones that had gone over before off and on throughout the day.

He picked his way through the patch of woods, down the slope, avoiding rocks in the dark, using the light from the flashlights of other's who had decided to scout ahead to see what was going on. What he saw...he'd never seen a city so dark, it looked like there wasn't a single electric light on down there. How the hell were they supposed to go to a refugee center if there was no power in the city? Then...the choppers circled the city...and started bombing it.

Shane stared; his hand going to his mouth to try and stop the cry of desperation that came from his throat. Those bastards were dropping napalm in the streets as a last act that would cost everyone dearly. If they were going this route...the refugee center was as good as gone...the people there probably already dead from the bombs. He cursed the military, the government, and all of the false promises. They had told people the city would be safe...and without even warning people that it wasn't anymore they bombed it. No one would have had time to leave or get somewhere safe. There hadn't even been a warning over the air, they could have done that at least.

It was the hospital all over again, the military trying to cut losses by offing everybody in the area. Jesus. Shane practically ran back to the jeep and the Peletier's Cherokee. “Better get back behind the wheel Ed and get the Hell out of here.”

“What?”

“Those choppers? They just dumped a whole lotta napalm in the streets, the city is done for man. We all need to find somewhere else to go.”

Carol was holding Sophia and Carl to her, eyes wide and frightened. “There's a campground not far from here.” She flicked her eyes to her husband. “Right Ed, you and your friends went there before for a survival camp.”

Ed glared daggers at her, but nodded. “Yeah, it ain't far.”

“Lead the way then Ed, we can't stay here. Those choppers might come back and start bombing the road.”

“Shit.” Ed flicked his cigarette away. “Ya heard the man, get in.”

Shane took Carl from Carol and got in his jeep and watched in his rear view mirror as Ed got the Cherokee backed up just enough to drive into the median to the outgoing lanes that were practically empty. Shane backed up and did the same, following the Cherokee's tail lights.

“The city's really not safe?” Carl asked.

“No man, the military bombed it.”

“Why?”

“Sometimes people panic, and do really stupid things.”

 

The campground Ed led them too wasn't much, but there was a building with showers and working toilets and that was more than Shane had been expecting. They parked by the building, using it as a barrier and angling their vehicles to almost form a triangle with just a couple of feet between their front bumpers. It was as close to 'circling the wagons' as they could get with just two cars, and gave them some protection should the dead show up at their makeshift camp.

It was already so late they didn't bother to set up their tents, just got their sleeping bags out with the kids’ right up against the wall with Carol. Ed was right beside them, with Shane taking first watch, telling Ed he'd wake him in about 4 hours. The other man grumbled about that, but Shane made it clear that if they were going to stick together they needed to cooperate. No one wanted to get eaten by the dead.

Shane got up on top of the Cherokee with his rifle and sat there, staring into the night, wondering just where they'd go after this. If Atlanta had been bombed, chances were that every city had been. There would be nowhere else to go. The cities wouldn't be safe, neither would the towns. They were screwed.

 

Over the next few days, their little camp grew a bit bigger, enough for them to increase the space between the vehicles, with more of them providing a sort of wall against anything that might approach them. Not to mention provide cover from bullets. It didn't last long though, Ed wasn't the agreeable type and the family that had joined them moved on.

Shane just happened to be fiddling with the CB in his jeep when he heard someone on it...it led them to a place to go. People and relative safety. They couldn't stay at the campground after all; it was too close to the main highway. For all they knew what was left of the military might come by and take them out. So he convinced Ed to follow him to their new camp.

An old abandoned rock quarry.

xxx

The Quarry fast became home, sort of. Shane supposed the group there would have been more welcoming if Ed hadn't been with them, and he didn't blame them. Ed Peletier was not his favorite person, but Shane hadn't come up with a good enough excuse to let the dead have the man. The one time he'd tried to bring up the bruises Carol sported the woman had shook her head and declined any help. However, if Ed ever hit her or Sophia in front of Carl, all bets were off.

Despite having Ed in camp not pulling his weight things were better. More people meant more guns, though only he and a man named Dale had guns. The Morales family had a baseball bat...and fella named Glenn seemed to take pleasure in killing the dead with a 9-iron. Shane thought the kid was a little crazy, going into the city twice a week for supplies, but he certainly wasn't going to. He couldn't, he was all Carl had left, and he wasn't going to make Carl go through losing a third parent.

So things settled. Shane took his turn at watch, Carl sleeping in the RV when he did, and sleeping in the tent when he didn't. Every other day or so Shane took all the biggest water jugs and coolers down to the lake to get water and the days were spent boiling the water over fires. They didn't want to be seen from a distance, so the boiling had to be done during the day, and keeping their fires low at night.

With the food Glenn brought them twice a week, and the water Shane brought up they were making do, but all of them would love to have some fresh meat. That particular need was met one day while Glenn was down in the city, and with that need came two new guns, a crossbow, and the Dixon brothers.

Daryl Dixon, who was a little rough around the edges, wasn't so bad. He kept to himself unless you got in his face and whenever he went into the woods he always came back with meat. Usually squirrel, but it was meat and it was fresh.

Merle Dixon, on the other hand, had two guns, a bad attitude, and if Shane was right, a stash of drugs. There wasn't a person in camp he hadn't insulted or made uncomfortable. The only good thing he'd done, was scare the piss outta of Ed Peletier when he'd caught the man eyeing up little Sophia. It was the only reason Shane hadn't kicked the guy out, because if Ed ever crossed that line he was going to need help dealing with him in a permanent fashion.

Sometimes he wondered how exactly he ended up in charge of the group...and it made him miss Rick something fierce, though he missed the man already. But Rick was a natural leader...and Shane would follow him anywhere.

 

There were other things he wondered about, like the strange friendship that developed between Glenn and Daryl...and the strange respect Merle seemed to have for the young Korean. Shane wasn't sure what was going on...and he wasn't sure he wanted to know. Though he highly suspected that Merle had tried something...and Glenn had let him have it with the 9-iron.

Some people, and Shane really could not get over the amount of gossip going around camp, some people thought Glenn and Daryl were together. Whether they were or not was no one's business, but Shane couldn't really see it himself. Not to mention Merle would probably be out for blood if it happened. The gossip died down some when Carl and Sophia followed them into the woods one day, which Carl got in trouble for, and confirmed that Daryl had been teaching Glenn to use the crossbow.

Still, it was the end of the world and the people in his camp gossiped like old men playing checkers on the porch of an old time general store.

xxx

The day had gotten tense as it wore on. Glenn had gone on a supply run to the city, which wasn't unusual. The kid, however, had taken a group with him, which was unusual. He'd protested loudly that he'd prefer to keep going alone, but Merle of all people had insisted he go along. Something about the two of them being able to carry more supplies; especially since he was so much bigger than Glenn. It led to several others volunteering to go with them. Hell Merle was going to be the only white guy going, which was probably the point. With a variety of races and two women as part of the group they may have thought they could handle Merle if he got out of hand.

The group had left early in the morning and been gone all day and everyone was getting worried. Then T-Dog had called on the CB to tell them they were trapped...and Shane figured that was it, that they were lost. He knew without Glenn and the others bringing supplies on a regular basis that the camp wouldn't last much longer, but they couldn't afford to go after them.

That pissed off Amy especially; her words, “She's my sister, you son of a bitch!” hit a chord deep within him...and he couldn't let it go. “Dale, watch Carl for a bit?”

“You think it’s wise to go after her?” Dale asked.

“I think I need too, Carl stay with Dale.” 

“Yes Shane.”

He followed her, his rifle in hand as it wasn't smart to leave it behind, and caught up with her in a moment. “Amy.”

“I don't want to talk to you.”

“Amy, hold up, I'm sorry I sounded like an asshole, but your sister wouldn't want you to risk your life for hers. I know this sucks, and it hurts-”

“You don't know anything!” She whirled on him and smacked him across his face. “Who have you lost? Anybody?”

“Carl's dad.”

“Wow, your best friend, we've all lost friends. I'm talking about my sister Shane!”

“And I'm talking about my husband!” He hissed back at her, hand up to his cheek where he could still feel it sting. “Rick was my best friend, my lover, and the past year...” He held up his left hand, two silver bands on his ring finger. “I had to leave him behind Amy. He'd been shot when we were called in to help deputies from another County...he was in a coma and I couldn't get him out of the hospital. It was full of the dead, and soldiers were shooting anything that moved in the head.”

“Oh my god.”

“I had to get Carl out...I was too late to save his mom. I'm sorry about Andrea, I am. But I cannot go down into that city to save her, not when I am the last person that boy has left on this earth.”

There were tears on her cheeks but she nodded in understanding. “Okay...you're right...she wouldn't want me down there.” Then she hugged him. “I'm sorry about your husband.”

The hug caught him off guard, but he returned it, found out he'd needed it. Amy was the first person he'd told about Rick, about what he'd really lost, and Shane found himself crying right along with her.

 

When Glenn showed up a few hours later in a stolen red car, the alarm wailing like a damn banshee, he was both relieved and pissed. Then that box van drove up and the others started piling out of it and he let some of that anger go. They'd gotten out, Amy hadn't lost her sister after all; she even shot him a smile over Andrea's shoulder. He was happy for her.

“How'd ya'll get out?” Shane asked. “We heard from T-Dog on the radio that you were trapped.”

“New guy got us out.” Glenn whispered. “Though it looks like they forgot Merle.”

“T-Dog dropped the key.” Andrea told her. “Down a drain, it was an accident Glenn.”

Carl leaned into Shane's side then, grabbing onto his arm and wiping at his eyes. Shane kneeled down to look him in the eye, knowing the reunion between the sisters and the Morales family was only reminding his boy of all that they'd lost and never get back.

“Hey, hey bud. I know. I know it hurts, but just remember how much your dad loved you, okay?” Carl nodded and wrapped his arms around Shane's neck. “I miss him too Carl.”

There was a silence that filled the camp then, filled with an energy he couldn't place and Shane pulled away from Carl and looked toward the box van. There was Rick, in his uniform, minus his hat, standing there staring at them in shock. Tears on his face.

Shane felt his jaw drop, his vision blurred by his own tears, and then Carl turned to see what he was looking at. His little body tensed and then he was pulling away from Shane and running for all he was worth.

“Dad!”

They met each other halfway, Rick going to his knees so Carl could run into his arms and they stayed there a second, both sobbing as Shane got to his feet, staggering forward, still not sure what he was seeing was real. Rick got to his feet, Carl up in his arms, neither one letting go of the other anytime soon and he headed straight for Shane.

Shane left his gun leaning against that red sports car and met Rick halfway, letting his husband pull him into his arms along with Carl. Then Rick's lips were on his and God how he'd missed this, missed every part of this man. How...he didn't even care how it was possible. Rick was alive, Rick was holding the both of them, and it was the happiest day of Shane's life, standing there with his forehead pressed to Rick's Carl in their arms.

No one said anything as they made their way to the main fire pit and collapsed at the side of it, never letting go of each other. Dale picked up his rifle and set it down close by and life went on around them as they huddled together just quietly basking and crying in one another's presence.

xxx

It wasn't until full dark after they'd eaten that Rick told them what had happened. How he'd woken up alone in the hospital, to all the dead piled up on the loading dock...the first Walker he'd seen. Shane couldn't imagine it, what Rick had been through.

“Shane said you died, like Mom.” Carl's words ran through him like a knife and Shane wanted to grovel and do whatever it took to make it up to Rick, leaving him behind the way he had.

Rick was a saint though and put Carl at ease. “He had every reason to believe that, don't you ever think any different.”

God, Shane was never going to forgive himself for leaving Rick behind the way he had...if he had known...if the damn soldiers hadn't been firing their guns maybe he would have heard Rick's heart beating.

“The doctors told us you and the other patients were going to be transferred to Atlanta...but then it never happened. The military took over the hospital then the dead overtook them and the soldiers just started shooting everyone it didn't matter if they were infected or not.” Shane swallowed his grief. “I tried to get you out of there man. No one would help me, and you still were hooked up to all those machines. I didn't know what to do. Then there was an explosion and the power cut out. I couldn't hear your heart; I couldn't hear you breathing...maybe it was the gunshots in the hallway or the screaming. But I swear babe, if I'd known you were still alive I'd of carried you out.”

“Shane, it’s okay. You got Carl here, he's safe...but I gotta ask. How did Lori die?”

“I went home first, packed a few things then went to her house...she'd been bitten and came after me. I had to...” Shane nearly choked on the words. “After, I put her in the trunk of her car...Carl was hiding in the attic.”

“Mom told me to.” The little boy murmured. “Before she got sick. She told me to go up there and hide and not to come out until Shane got there.”

“Your mom was absolutely right.” Rick's hand found Shane's and they held tight to one another.

xxx

Carl was asleep on his cot across the tent; Shane on his own cot with Rick crowded up close behind him, holding him. Normally Shane took first watch, but Jim had offered to switch with him so he could get a full night with his reunited family. Shane hadn't been about to turn him down.

“I went to Lori's first. Saw that some of Carl's things were gone, found Al Cranson in the yard. All that blood, I figured Lori was dead. Went to our house next...saw that picture of the three of us gone. Knew it meant you were okay.”

Shane turned so they could kiss. “I am so sorry man.” Rick kissed him again. 

“You did what you had to Shane. I'll never find fault with that.” He smiled down at Shane. “Mind if I have this back?” He tapped the second wedding ring on Shane's finger and Shane nodded, slipping it off and onto Rick's. Then he gave Shane a wicked grin. “I don't suppose you have anything?”

Shane snorted and reached for his duffel. “You know I keep lube in there no matter what, there's still a full tube in there from the last time we took Carl camping.” He pulled out the tube and offered it to Rick. “You know he won't wake up.”

“Which I'm thankful for.”

Still they were as quiet as they could be as they made love, stripped naked, eager to touch all that skin they'd never thought they'd be able to touch again. Shane had his legs spread wide and relished the feeling of Rick opening him up and stretching him after so long. He'd gotten tight in Rick's absence, and that seemed to spur his husband on even further, made him more eager.

Then Rick was sliding into him and Shane wanted to shout at the perfection of it, and if they'd been in their bed in their house alone he would have. Rick must have known that because he held Shane close so Shane could bite down on his shoulder instead.

Every movement was slow and calculated and Rick's hands seemed to be everywhere, like he hadn't touched him in years. If Shane were being honest with himself it felt like it had been that long. As soon as they had a moment alone where no one could hear him Shane was going to make sure Rick got a chance to pound into him so he'd feel it for days and then all of this would feel more real. Less like a dream that came true.

“Hey there?” Rick smiled down at him. “Where'd you go?”

Shane reached up to cup Rick's face, hands tracing over that familiar stubble, his heart racing. “Is this real?'

“It’s real, baby. I'm right here. I've got you.” He shifted, and lifted Shane's hips a bit and Shane saw stars. “I've got you Shane.”

“Harder.” Shane urged against his lips.

Rick chuckled. “We both know you can't keep quiet for shit if I do that, but I promise I will. Soon as I can.” He leaned down to whisper in his ear. “I'll have you on your hands and knees, just the way you like. That's what you want right?”

Shane managed to nod. “This is good too.”

“Just remember we ain't done after this.” Rick kissed him again, rocking into him. “I want you inside of me before the night is over.”

“Well now, you know I'll never say no to that.” Shane wasn't able to say much more, because Rick ground into him and took him in his hand and Shane had to bite into his own arm to keep from crying out.

And then Rick spilled into him, leaving Shane a lethargic mess, and Shane wasn't sure he'd be able to reciprocate the way Rick wanted. Until Rick slipped out of him and crawled down his body, nearly bending Shane in half to lick him clean, tongue deep inside of him. The second Shane started to get hard again he knew he'd be able to do whatever Rick wanted of him, for hours if need be.

They both worked to get Rick stretched and opened up and then the other man was working himself down on Shane's cock and it suddenly became real. Rick was really there with him, and Shane felt the tears come again as he ran his hands over every bit of Rick's body he could reach.

“I'm here baby. I've got you Shane, always.” Rick whispered, smiling down at him, and Shane had never been gladder.

XXX


End file.
